Illusion to the abyss.
Being alive means a constant struggle. Struggle to maintain a career, relationship and loyalties. Like Sisyphus, every person is rolling the rock up to the mountain. However, not every person knows about his fate. Most of the time, he is in the imagination that there is a castle on the peak and he is rolling the last rock required to complete it. His belief in illusions makes him so much additive and comfortable that now he can not live without them anymore. Unfortunately, at that point, the bubble has to be popped. Illusions are like water bubbles. Once they suddenly disappear, it seems like they never existed. It leaves the person in psychological exhaustion. He feels like he is living in an abyss.
After the end of his illusion, the first visible effect is the conflict of mind and heart. The human mind is powerful enough to understand the depth of lies and deceptions. However, the heart still believes that the thing can work out. The brain tells him to move on, while the soul makes him surrender all his worth. He wants to get back to his illusion, where he was happy and living a beautiful life. The heart is too innocent to understand that the people say what they do not mean, and people mean what they do not say.
The conflict of mind and heart is often confused with the clash of emotions. Because you are kind one time and angry at the next moment. For instance, if one person gives a candy to a child and after sometimes snatches it. How would the child behave? For the first moments, the child will take it as a joke, and he will request you to give the candy back to him. Imagine that the person assures the kid, that he will give the candy to a kid, but does the opposite? The child will start crying and use all his good and unpleasant ways to get his candy back. It does not mean that the child is emotionally unstable. It just means that he is rolling the stone up to the mountain to get his candy back. Soon, the person misinterprets the child reaction as an insult, and throws the candy out of the window, without caring about the hurt he caused to the child.
The reader would believe that the person was mean, while the child was innocent. However, in real life, it is quite the opposite. For example, when a man is ready to do everything to get back the woman he loves. Everyone would second guess his intentions. It is hard to admit that he is affected by suddenly getting out of his false ascribing of reality. All he ever needed was her love, and he is just trying to win her back. Instead of understanding his devotion, the average woman throws the candy out of the window. It puts the existence of the man in the question.
Unlike a child, the man keeps on questioning. Because the candy did not fell in front of his eyes. At this stage, his mind knows the truth, but the heart can not accept it. The heart keeps on waiting for the candy. The woman ignores him, considering him toxic without thinking for a moment that at least he deserves the truth. He deserves to know the “no”.
Many men do not get the answer. From there, the abyss begins. It is a continual cycle of drowning and surviving. Whenever he can breathe, he wants the answers. Whether she is with him or not? Are these the consequences for his dedication, love and mistakes?
An already stressed person goes down to the second layer of the abyss. There, he counts his blunders and tries to make sense of it. He accepts all the blames and tries to make it right. On the other hand, the woman had lost interest already. She gives him last chance, but not the love, he desires. Moreover, She starts taking all his action critically and wait for a minor mistake, that can finally liberate her. A wise man can understand and crack it.
In most of the case, he offers her a way out without any explanation. It gives her the best way out without taking any blame. From hugs, kisses, love to being together in a difficult time, she tends to forget all the moments they spent together. It all means nothing to her. In contrast, all the good memories become nightmares for the man. He gets the flashback, even in his dreams. It leads him to the innermost layer of the abyss, where he might stay his whole lifetime. The only way out is his sheer will-power. Even if he wields the mighty strength and power, it will take him years to get out of it.
The woman is also affected by it but only for the short term. Soon, she finds a new one that may or may not be better than him. She continuously struggles to search for a better man, without realising that she didn’t throw a candy but a diamond out of the window. She learns it very late that no one can ever love her like him.
Mesa has rightly said “Everyone says love hurts, but that is not true. Loneliness hurts. Rejection hurts. Losing someone hurts. Envy hurts. Everyone gets these things confused with love, but in reality, love is the only thing in this world that covers up all pain and makes someone feel wonderful again. Love is the only thing in this world that does not hurt” (Meša Selimović).
Everything, I explain above was not love but the consequences of loneliness, rejection, losing someone, and envy. The main culprits here are lack of trust, poor understanding of each other and a long distance. One can escape the abyss, and the illusion can turn into reality if the man and woman make a deal and cure each other with love and devotion.
